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10 Things I've Learned as a Parent This Week (#24)

1.I don't care how strong you think you are, nobody is stronger than a baby that doesn't want to get dressed.

2.Incredibly smug parents are more irritating than genital warts.

3.It's entirely possible for a sweet, beautiful baby to stink like the Glastonbury toilets.

4.If youth is wasted on the young, parenthood is wasted on the tired.

5.My son's "poo stare" is more intense than an episode of This Is England.

6.A 6 month old kicking you in the balls is funny. An 11 month old kicking you in the balls isn't.

7.People who don't pick their dog shit up from kids parks should have their nose rubbed in it.

8.Nothing halts frivolity quicker than a baby grabbing your glasses.

9.I'm pretty sure the lingering stench of that last nappy has taken value off our house.

10.Getting pissed on by your baby is not an acceptable Mother's Day gift.

I'm a stand up comic and dad of twins. Click here to follow my blog on Facebook.
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Comments

Peter Floyd said…
nice and cute baby
14 March 2016 at 09:37
marta said…
On the off chance that there was intelligence accessible the offer you some assistance with avoiding a few pitfalls in life would you exploit this learning or overlook it and go the long hard street of reiteration and trouble? As I think back I now see what number of hardships I didn't need to confront in the event that I had taken my guardians counsel; now I will offer my kids some assistance with breaking this cycle and gain by this significant understanding.
16 March 2016 at 04:18
Unknown said…
My son's "poo stare" is more intense than an episode of This Is England. kinda funnny... liked your post...thanks here you can checkout some stuff for you child..from babies... Good luck
26 March 2016 at 13:50
William Braylen said…
One of the most important things that you should learn as a parent is how to understand your child. You need to know that your child has a unique personality that will remain for the rest of his or her life.
19 June 2016 at 05:36
FreshBabyGear said…
If you constantly find yourself in disagreement with your teenager because of the generation gap, parenting will be a frustrating experience. You must Learn Smart Parenting to have a harmonious relationship with your teenagers.
24 July 2016 at 07:14
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