1. Never mind the big salaries at the BBC, I'm more annoyed they pissed money away making more than one episode of In The Night Garden.
2. That moment you're wolfing down your kid's leftovers and your partner says, 'They spat most of that out you know...'
3. This toddler 'mine' stage has gone supernova. My two year old just claimed both my feet were his.
4. My boys trying to feed yoghurt to their Nan over Skype is fucking hilarious. 🤣🤣
5. The day before the binmen come is like Christmas Eve in our house. That's not right.
6. My two year old has started carrying a croquet mallet everywhere with him, like some upper class Negan.
7. A piss stained bus stop is no place for a family picnic.
8. ME: What's the opposite of hot?