Skip to main content

5 Things I Learned as a Parent This Week (#33)

1.Paying £40 a day for nursery when your kid is too ill to go because of a bug they caught at nursery smarts like a kick in the knackers.

2.6 hours unbroken sleep feels like a gift from the gods.

3.At 4.35am Tellytubbies makes complete sense.

4.The closest thing to dirty talk when you've got kids is your wife suggesting you order a Domino's and eat it in bed.

5.One of the most magical sounds is hearing your partner and kids laughing their head off together in the next room.

Labels:

Comments

Anonymous said…
The final customization designed to the actual outside the replica watches as well as band may be the re-polishing (carried out manually) to complement the initial rado replica uk. This really is carried out through Tiago, their own in-house grasp polisher (as well as, through the appears from the web site, replica watches sale. By the outcomes, they have cause in order to yell about this – the actual view will seem like the initial, in the entrance a minimum of. Switching this to begin to see the cup situation back again, the bespoke precious metal rotor as well as stability link, along with a title besides replica rolex sale designing the actual motion may break the actual false impression — or possibly not really. L’ensemble des Artists de Genève may create simply 2 wrist replica watches uk monthly, as well as We anticipate exactly what arrives following.
6 September 2016 at 07:07
Unknown said…
Woes began out on the sidewalk, where approximately 300 eager shoppers christian louboutin outlet uk were waiting outside when the doors opened for the sale's second day at 8am. There were so many people that you had to wait in a separate line to then wait in the one that would actually cheap christian louboutin get you into the sale. By the tipster's estimate, the crowd consisted "almost entirely [of] people without invitations. Some groups seemed to have one invite for 2-3 people, which of course christian louboutin for sale doesn't work." And, as usual, "invites were checked at the door and were very strict. You needed an invite + ID + to be on list. No one is going to sneak into this."
24 February 2017 at 03:02
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

10 Things I've Learned as a Parent This Week (#29)

1.I cannot believe I EVER complained about being tired pre-kids. 2.That moment when you think there's something seriously wrong with your baby but quickly realise they're just having a massive shite. Ridiculous. 3.The key to cleaning Weetabix off the floor is not to leave it for 10 days. 4.I'm struggling to come to terms with the fact my next lie in will be in 2026. 5.I can recite all the words to The Furchester Hotel yet struggle remembering my own PIN number. 6.They should make talking baby toys swear. Just once or twice a year to keep us interested. 7.I could pick out the noise of a dummy hitting the floor in the middle of an earthquake. 8.Putting shoes on a baby will make you twice as late. 9.I could shave a chimp with ADHD quicker than I can dress my son. 10.Only if they ever make me a grandad will my boys truly understand how much I love them. I'm a finalist in the MAD Blog Awards 2016 and you can vote for me in both '
2 comments
Read more

The Time I Screamed at my Kids

Before my kids arrived I swore I’d never shout at them. But choosing how to approach parenthood before your kids are born is like a caterpillar deciding what kind of butterfly they’re gonna be while they’re still building the cocoon. ‘I’ll still do loads of charity work, of course. And I’ll be REALLY nice to moths too, even though they’ll probably hate me because I’ll be so bloody gorgeous.’ Theory and reality are like sugar and shit. I’ve raised my voice to my kids more times than I can count. Often just to shout ‘STOP SHOUTING!’ which I’m aware doesn’t set a great example. ‘You should NEVER shout at your kids.’ And that’s fine. In theory. Because everything’s fine in theory. The Slimfast diet is a piece of piss until day two when you’ve had three hours sleep and someone offers you a Wagon Wheel. Of course, I never WANT to shout at them. I love them more than words can describe. But those you love are also the ones blessed with the innate ability to boil your piss q
Post a Comment
Read more

We Have a Winner!

Ladies and gentlemen - some news! One recipient of my newsletter is now the 'lucky' (ahem) winner of an exclusive gig from me IN THEIR HOUSE! And that person is... Lyn Morter!  Well done, Lyn! (Btw, if anyone from  Ofcom  is reading, you can check the legitimacy of this result via the  Facebook Live video  I did last week.) When I informed Lyn that she'd won she simply said, 'I've never heard of you' and 'How did you get my phone number?' so I'm sure that will be a great gig for everyone. (Only joking. She was thrilled.) Thanks to all of you for entering. But what now, Sam?  I hear you screaming at your smartphones. Well, I'll be taking things a wee bit easier through August, spending some much needed time with my family after all the touring. But just like that former Governor of California of Austrian descent, I'LL BE BACK (sorry) in September with more blogs, videos and general waffle.  I'm also heading b
Post a Comment
Read more