10 Things I've Learned as a Parent This Week (#29)

1.I cannot believe I EVER complained about being tired pre-kids.

2.That moment when you think there's something seriously wrong with your baby but quickly realise they're just having a massive shite. Ridiculous.

3.The key to cleaning Weetabix off the floor is not to leave it for 10 days.

4.I'm struggling to come to terms with the fact my next lie in will be in 2026.

5.I can recite all the words to The Furchester Hotel yet struggle remembering my own PIN number.

6.They should make talking baby toys swear. Just once or twice a year to keep us interested.

7.I could pick out the noise of a dummy hitting the floor in the middle of an earthquake.

8.Putting shoes on a baby will make you twice as late.

9.I could shave a chimp with ADHD quicker than I can dress my son.

10.Only if they ever make me a grandad will my boys truly understand how much I love them.

I'm a finalist in the MAD Blog Awards 2016 and you can vote for me in both 'Best New Blog' and 'Best Baby Blog' categories - if you have 30 seconds to spare click here and I'll be your best mate for life.

Comments

Renee Christel Rispin said…

When The Furchester Hotel comes on its more like, Welcome....to the SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT... That theme songs just reminds me I'm late for work and the baby is still not dressed in his jumperoo.

Renee @peonieandme x

2 May 2016 at 12:25

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13 January 2017 at 08:11

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We Have a Winner!

Ladies and gentlemen - some news! One recipient of my newsletter is now the 'lucky' (ahem) winner of an exclusive gig from me IN THEIR HOUSE! And that person is... Lyn Morter! Well done, Lyn! (Btw, if anyone from Ofcom is reading, you can check the legitimacy of this result via the Facebook Live video I did last week.) When I informed Lyn that she'd won she simply said, 'I've never heard of you' and 'How did you get my phone number?' so I'm sure that will be a great gig for everyone. (Only joking. She was thrilled.) Thanks to all of you for entering. But what now, Sam? I hear you screaming at your smartphones. Well, I'll be taking things a wee bit easier through August, spending some much needed time with my family after all the touring. But just like that former Governor of California of Austrian descent, I'LL BE BACK (sorry) in September with more blogs, videos and general waffle. I'm also heading b

Sam Avery

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