Skip to main content

The Secret Diary of a 7 Month Old (Part 6)


MONDAY
Cried all afternoon. Big people wanted me to sleep but I was far too tired for that.

TUESDAY
Puked on three different outfits today just as they got me into them. Made the big person cry. Felt guilty which made me do a poo. It leaked. Felt even more guilty. Puked again. Went to sleep.

WEDNESDAY
Getting sick of complete strangers squeezing my cheeks. Here’s an idea – if I don’t know you, don’t touch my face. How does that sound?

THURSDAY
Managed to burp, puke and then sneeze all over the sofa. What a mess. But what a feeling!

FRIDAY
Got taken to a fancy room with loads of lights and mirrors and stuff to touch. Was so excited. Slept right through it.

SATURDAY
Don’t think I’ve pooed for a while. I used to poo all the time. Should I be worried?

SUNDAY
Laughed properly today, like one of the big people. It felt amazing. Then got tired and screamed the house down. Life is so confusing.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

3 y/o kicks me in balls...

3 y/o kicks me in balls I fall to ground He offers to kiss it better I politely decline He gets upset I explain nuance of appropriate behaviour while writhing around in total agony Wife arrives I ask her to kiss it better She declines with fury Will cherish these family memories  šŸ’—

TOUR ANXIETY DREAMS

Had my first anxiety dream about the tour last night - despite everyone having tickets nobody turned up because there was a national babysitters strike... šŸ˜‚   (I had no pants on either but that’s standard for anxiety dreams isn’t it, guys? Guys?) So please do ensure you book a non-unionised babysitter before getting your tickets here:  bit.ly/LearnerParentTour Tour starts in October and runs through till next March. Can’t wait to see some of you there.  šŸ‘ šŸ¤“